Seventeen Years of Marriage

    Today my bride and I celebrate seventeen years of marriage.  The rings you see above display the weathering, scratches and soil of living as a couple.   These years included ten moves, five home purchases, four children (14, 11, 8, 3), one baby on the way (34 weeks thank you God), four miscarried babies in heaven, hundreds of friends across the country, illnesses galore (some very scary), tears of joy for children’s achievements, arguments, resolutions, and deep religious growth granted by God’s grace of faith to both of us inside the sacrament of marriage.   We each fear the premature loss of the other more than ever.  Just the thought takes our collective breath away.

    We now, through the years of experience, understand the deep commitment required to maintain this relationship.  We learned of the complex interaction between all the forms of love: agape (self gift), philia (friendship), ludus (playful), and eros (physical).   At this point of our marriage we can only say we are starting to to keep them all in proper perspective.  We find our marital joys multiply when we use these tools God built in us while building his kingdom here on earth.  This understanding is right on time.   Little kids normally only provide little problems.  Big kids have the big head hurting problems to deal with.  The next seventeen years should be more interesting then the last seventeen.  Therefore we have a lot more work to do on our relationship.

    My wife and I lamented the Supreme Court ruling yesterday.  It was wrong on a matter of states rights and morality.  More importantly it gave into the concept that everyone deserves happiness and love as they personally define it at this moment.  The concept of love people throw around in common speech today, has a diluted definition resulting from poor catechesis by churches and schools.  I also venture to say the concept comes from a lack of self reflection.  The constant bombardment of noise in our brains from so many media sources provides no silence in which God can be heard.  If our marriage followed such a fluid metric, we would be a separated wreck of humanity by now.  

    We will pray our country does not continue down this manmade path of tyranny.  This is of course the inevitable result in any country refusing to subordinate itself (and its rulers) to Natural Law principles.   This couple will continue to trust in God’s compass, not our internally flawed guidance systems subject to radical narcism.  We will need it to navigate the scary world now before us.

    Thank you God for making my wife, and revealing yourself to us through the graces of his son Jesus Christ by  the power of the Holy Spirit.  I am grateful for the journey you gave us to travel together.  Amen.






Wishing for My Someone


Last night I ran out with friends to grab a bite to eat and I was longing for my lovely wife to be with me. I knew she might enjoy the sights, sounds and a little treat…

Oh well just under 42 hours or so and I’ll be with her and the four little people I love so much! Time does make the heart grow fonder…but that happens to me after 8 hours at work! I hope when I retire from my second career I can merge family and work a little better.


PS X-20 with post in Snapseed. Fun composition. I did open up the shutter on purpose to get the movement of the cars. Snapsee continues to amaze me with fun tools and output.

For my Babcha!

Babcha's Flower

Babcha’s Flower

Each year, right now, the gardenia’s bloom in my back yard.  When we moved into the house I was drawn to their complete package of beauty and fragrance.  If I had seen these flowers before, I had no memory of them.  I just knew they were something important to capture and enjoy.

Last year I shot a few of these wonderful flowers and sent them off to my family, only to hear a wonderful love story.  See paternal grandfather, DjaDja, brought these to my Babcha (grandmother) when they were dating since she loved them.  This was expensive during the war, especially up in the cooler climate of Boston.  My Babcha enjoyed them so much, they made up her bridal bouquet!

That love story took place during World War II, but I only found out about it the day I sent her the photos some seventy years later.  For years that lovely story laid dormant, untold and a my connection to these flowers unknown.  Only by sharing this image, which cannot compare to the real thing, did I learn how they are part of my story.

Since that day last year, when my Babcha sent me a lovely note, I’ve found myself anxious for them to reappear.  I’ve also shared other flowers with my wife a little more impulsively than in the past.  With each gift I think of my Babcha and DjaDja as I knew them as a child around thirty five years ago.  Two people very much in love, smiling together, and loving each other through the better, poorer, health and sickness parts of life.

So with the gardenia bloom I think of those two people in love, and try to show my wife the same devotion I remember my DjaDja doting on his bride.  That is a legacy I don’t want to ever forget.

So as i used to tell him….Thanks Dja